Found it, finally, thanks. 27 minutes of fumbling total. I'm hardly an unskilled user. Probably among the most common needs people have?
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Replying to @zeynep
Yeah definitely. You're right and this is being worked on.
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Replying to @trevorphillippi
Showing people's active status to one another by default is actually anti-social and friction-creating.
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Replying to @zeynep @trevorphillippi
If encouraging healthy social interactions were the goal, it would be off by default, with instructions on how to build a controlled list.
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Replying to @zeynep
This is good feedback I want to dig into a bit. If you knew a close friend was currently active would you be more likely to message them?
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Replying to @trevorphillippi
Of course. Absolutely. Therein lies the problem: it drives up your stats to show by default, but is fundamentally anti-social and unhealthy.
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Replying to @zeynep @trevorphillippi
Social presence is a form of pressure, and "seeing" people encourages messaging and thus pressuring people to reply--it works.
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Replying to @zeynep
Right. So you'd prefer a model where in the event you already have intent to message someone, you have a bit of transparency into 1/2
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Replying to @trevorphillippi @zeynep
The likelihood they're able to respond (assuming opted-in.) 2/2
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Replying to @trevorphillippi
Yep, assuming opted-in. Especially problem for women, who have higher expectations of being nurturing, penalized more for not responding.
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Issue isn't the functionality, if allowed to opt-in with transparency, that it's on *for everyone* by default, and wow, hard to figure out.
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Replying to @zeynep
It's a model that's weird for mobile messaging but worked for something like AIM, which is kind of how Messenger started.
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Replying to @trevorphillippi
A billion people later, this shouldn't be so hard to figure out. Healthy social interaction and engagement stats are often at odds.
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