I don’t worry about acute stressors’ effect on my psyche. I worry about chronic stressors. Whenever possible, I amortize the process of dealing with psychological issues.
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My life is difficult through my own doing I’ve set impossible standards for myself since I was young I’m thankful that I can access states of gratitude, relaxation, and love at times It’s harder for me to love myself at any given point in time than for me to do anything else
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People have tried to love me at various points, and I haven’t let them. Always afraid of satisfaction. Afraid that I wouldn’t Become the Ideal.
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At other times, I forget the women who have been in my life, and think to myself: why am I alone? I get into a thought loop: Ah, it must be because I’m unlovable in my current state. I need to grind harder. Then I inflict more psychological pain on myself.
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I love being in high energy states. I’m committed to Experiencing life and loving God. Right now, I feel gratitude. I feel blessed for my family and the wonderful friends I have. I’m working on what I perceive to be the most interesting software project other than Bitcoin.
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Replying to @yungdeleuze
Logan — Might I reccomend a book? Implicit in this thread are questions. Think you’ll find “The Sufi Path of Love” by William Chittick an interesting window. —When I read such books, I don’t get hung up on labels, and just read for the merit of its perspective and ideas.
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Thanks for the recommendation Bushra.
I always enjoy feedback on my thoughts; it’s the primary reason I put them out there.
Ordered!
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Replying to @yungdeleuze @startuployalist
“I always enjoy feedback on my thoughts; it’s the primary reason I put them out there.” that’s healthiest thing i’ve read in a long time! i may borrow that
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