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Watching you go through this was like watching a sad movie where you already know how it ends.
Even though I didn't know exactly you were gonna go for a Mac, why not an XPS 13" or 15" with Arch Linux and i3 Window manager?
I think @yoshuawuyts and @mafintosh are happy with theirs
Got a Thinkpad, and couldn't be happier. Hands down best dev experience I've ever had 
System 76 + Arch + i3 + poly = 
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