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  1. . He taught more than Luke that day in the swamp...

  2. Watching the Death Star battle from New Hope and thinking "Poe Dameron would be done already."

  3. Have ya'll been past a movie theater this weekend? The lines for "Sisters" are insane.

  4. ::very delicately asks Lego Store attendant if there are darker-skinned minifigs he can buy::

  5. All I'm saying is that there better be a character called Son of Porkins.

  6. Gave accurate directions to SantaCon-ers and felt so dirty.

  7. Seriously, someone should tell 10,000 Maniacs that their moment has come again.

  8. We're excited about Apocalypse in X-Men, you can buy a Nirvana shirt at Target, and Clinton is running for president. Welcome back, 1990s.

  9. If I could be a carb I would be the biggest carb.

  10. No, I'm not awake. You are.

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  12. I'm starting to...like?...comments that boil down to "I'm generalizing your organization because I'm angry about something else in my life!"

  13. I want a Star Wars Holiday Special about the Rebel engineer who figured out the weakness to the first Death Star.

  14. Play my 6-episode space saga in Super Mario Maker! Three acts! Plot twists! I made it for your Thanksgiving break!

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  15. Everybody go home.

  16. FYI to those seeking "hobbit pron": The non-tracking search engine Duck Duck Go is tracked by Google Analytics.

  17. Just got the "broken bottle" con tried on me outside the Flatiron! That's a first.

  18. You fools! You haven't trapped Shia LaBeouf in the theater. YOU are trapped in there with HIM.

  19. HOT PUBLISHING TIP: The IRS doesn't accept tax forms with shadows on them, so sending me a phone pic of it just keeps us at Step One.

  20. Trump's campaign is like watching Twitter run for President.

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