Between good faith actors trying to arrive at the truth, quibbling over terminology is dumb - all you need to do is clarify what the other party means by a given term. In public discourse, it is absolutely necessary, because certain terms are so emotionally loaded.
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I think It's not only a failure of bad acting unfortunately. Earnest metaphysical conversations frequently get derailed the same way.
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I think part of it is that people are engaging in cognitive compression, or don't realize they are using a term in an overbroad/imprecise way.
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