a while back I read @ben_r_hoffman's post on the Sabbath and was struck by the idea of the Sabbath as an alarm (thread)
"it is permissible to break the Sabbath in an emergency situation, when lives are at stake...if you try to keep it but end up breaking it every week...(1/n)
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...then you should consider that perhaps, despite the propaganda of the palliatives, you are in a permanent state of emergency. This is not okay. You are not doing okay."
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I liked the idea that routines may have an intrinsic benefit, and also a secondary function as an alarm bell for your state of well-being. I started keeping track of routines that fail for me shortly before I realize that I'm not doing okay.
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I've extended that habit to noticing mental and behavioral patterns outside of my routines that indicate problems even minor ones, like being slightly too stressed out or tired, or slight interpersonal friction with my loved ones this thread is a list of my personal alarms
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1. preferring baths to showers I like baths -- they're indulgent, comforting but if I find the prospect of standing up to shower in the morning "too hard," this is generally a sign of stress I'm not sure why, but when I'm feeling engaged and content, showering is easy
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2. fantasizing about "going back in time and starting over" ruminating on what I would do differently indicates some dissatisfaction, particularly interpersonal dissatisfaction when I'm happy, the thought of changing anything is appalling -- I might miss out on my loved ones
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3. over-grooming if I start spending too much time on my grooming, that's another sign of stress. I always care about self-maintenance but spending ages in front of the mirror poking my skin, painting my nails multiple times a week, etc can turn obsessive
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I can spend too much time trying to get my life in order, crossing an endless list of nagging neurotic tasks off my list. Procrastination is actually a healthy antidote - many of these 'problems' actually just work themselves out.
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