emily worb

@worbeo

brownemilyelizabeth@gmail.com

Joined February 2009
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  1. Pinned Tweet
    4 Sep 2010

    watching the episode where lisa pees in the diaper

    2 replies 3 retweets 34 likes
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  2. Jun 7

    Every day I weigh myself at Rite Aid

    1 reply 19 likes
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  3. Jun 3

    I was born to work at the post office

    1 reply 33 likes
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  4. Jun 1

    I'm serious

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  5. Jun 1

    Anyone want to write me a letter of recommendation for Yiddish summer school

    3 replies 18 likes
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  6. May 28

    Slot machines are still allowed to be so racist

    4 likes
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  7. May 28

    I'm visiting family in Oregon but they won't let me near them since I have a cold, so I've spent the night in my hotel room looking at Jerry Lewis's estate auction. Some highlights, not including his SEVENTY THREE guns:

    2 replies 3 retweets 38 likes
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  8. May 24

    Hope I see a celebrity today

    1 retweet 14 likes
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  9. May 13

    I've spent 15 minutes trying to wash this charcoal scrub off my face and I still look like a vaudeville orphan

    28 likes
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  10. May 12

    Wow just remembered that the guy from the "Berries and Cream" commercial taught at Bard

    2 replies 31 likes
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  11. May 10

    Bored... think I'll enter my dead relatives into to get them posthumously baptized by the Mormon church

    13 likes
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  12. May 1

    Moving 10 minutes away to "downtown Ridgewood" is going to change my life

    16 likes
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  13. May 1

    Can someone recommend a sunscreen plz? I have sensitive skin...the skincare subreddits are too overwhelming

    5 replies 7 likes
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  14. Apr 29

    I wish I was entrusted with emotion the way Hollywood blockbuster directors are

    9 likes
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  15. Apr 27

    Imagine if these were the only sections on your Wikipedia page

    2 replies 21 retweets 226 likes
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  16. Apr 27

    I'll tell my social security number to basically anybody

    2 replies 41 likes
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  17. Apr 25

    Every time I cross the street I fear for my life

    18 likes
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  18. Apr 24

    The most villainous empty house in Mill Basin yet

    1 reply 29 likes
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  19. Apr 23

    Lately on the train I've started playing "would I rather be them or me" where I look at people and decide if I'd rather be them or stay myself

    1 reply 6 retweets 117 likes
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  20. Apr 23

    Wonder what's up at JibJab these days...

    1 reply 6 likes
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  21. Apr 22

    Banned from the library again

    1 reply 31 likes
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