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  1. Retweeted
    11 hours ago

    one day man will be judged not off the charge of his phone, but of the content of his screenshot

  2. 23 hours ago

    Lol this guy was my 7th grade math teacher he was the best

  3. Retweeted
    Jun 5

    Are the Cavs gonna get swept?

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  4. Retweeted
    Jun 7

    Cow: is this bus going downtown?? Driver: depends on whether or not you have moola lolol Cow: I'm fucking late to work Craig

  5. Retweeted
    Jun 8

    I've never wanted Trump to tweet so badly in my entire life. Pick your phone up! Do it!! DO IT!!!!

  6. Retweeted
    Jun 8

    at this point I can't look at Rubio without hearing Pod Save America's weekly evisceration of him in stereo

  7. Retweeted
    Jun 8

    Comey QOTD: "I've seen the tweet about 'tapes.' Lordy, I hope there are tapes."

  8. Jun 8

    Lordy

  9. Retweeted
    Jun 8

    Me, waiting for the Comey hearing to start

  10. Retweeted
    Jun 7
  11. Jun 7
  12. Retweeted
    Jun 6
  13. Retweeted
    Jun 6

    All this "alt" stuff is starting to piss me off. There is only one "alt" and that's alt rock.

  14. Retweeted
    Jun 7
    Replying to

    if they'll have me. I'll fuck snake eyes up

  15. Retweeted
    Jun 5
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  16. Retweeted
    Jun 5

    we just cracked open a cold one with the pizza guy

  17. Jun 6

    Damn last night was a mess

  18. Jun 5

    Uber driver pulled up in a minivan, limo driver hat, Metallica blasting

  19. Retweeted
    Jun 5

    Tonight finna be fun as fuck

  20. Jun 5

    It always amazes me how terrible at video games I am

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