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Jesus take the Wii Wheel
Any squirrel can be a flying squirrel if you shoot it from a T-shirt cannon at my neighbor Jeff while he's cutting the grass, fuck u Jeff
wat a beautibful day! the sun is a violent firebal, the sky is a celestial dome protectimg us from the infinite darkness of space, the birds
Wasn't Sailor Jupiter a giantess? Is that part of the 'in joke', too? 
william shatner tweeted about sailor moon today
Got a couple of educational pamphlets so I could be a more responsible pet owner. pic.twitter.com/DMiXPHB0Uv
This Chinese red pork curry smells so good I could punch a cop in the face
Tonight, Chinese red pork curry!
.@PappyShannon definitely the best part. I wanna know what opera that lady was headed to
I love a good piney IPA - Drinking an Easy Jack by @FirestoneWalker @ Red Papaya — http://untpd.it/s/c123444083
What if you lost your butt. Like straight up misplaced it
If you want a vision of the future it's me and @winnersusedrugs tooling around Seattle in a semi-truck forever.
Can't wait for the new episode of CSI:NCIS tonight
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