On causing conversational cache misses:https://twitter.com/webdevMason/status/994080521893371904 …
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True, but there is also good research on the value of "phatic communication" - i.e. exchanging kind trivialities just to re-affirm bonds and signal acknowledgment of the other person's presence. Problems arise when this is *all* there is....
Dunno how well this has been tested, because I don't think many people show genuine interest in each other much at all. A performative "how are you?" is preferable to nothing, but asking it in a way that indicates that you actually care about the answer seems strictly better
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100%!
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Granted, none of us have the energy to do this all the time, so rote expressions of care and affection can act as relationship bookmarks. There's a reason we do the caching thing: it saves cognitive effort! My argument is that most people habitually underuse their cognition
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