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"Take responsibility for everything in your life" is controversial advice for good reason, but the more I internalize it the better things get. Brains seem to be satisfied with either a solution to a problem OR someone to blame, and taking the latter off the table just *works*
Some people presumably have the ability to allocate blame, feel anger, and then solve the problem regardless of whether or not they "should have to." I don't. Self-righteous anger is a psychological tar pit for me. I could honestly build a life around screaming into the void.
My 2017 takeaway isn't necessarily to go find a zen state free of judgment or negative emotions, but to make sure that some kind of actual solution lives in the general direction toward which I'm pointing my energy. If I feel like I'm sinking in tar, I'm probably sinking in tar.
In moderation. IMO taken too far it can lead to hubris, believing you can control everything, or depression when you try to own up to everything e.g. incompatibilities in a relationship.
I (mostly) agree. Hubris is a mixed bag; some very talented people are able to do a lot with it. Depression is definitely not the goal. If taking greater ownership over your situation leads to a weaker sense of agency rather than a stronger one, this advice is not for you
@jockowillink approves. EXTREME OWNERSHIP.
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