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It's easy enough to recalibrate. Is the kid coming home exhausted but energized, desperate to keep chewing or working on the day's ideas? Or is he defeated? A child that can be described as "defeated" should be the abnormality. We've let it become *much* too close to the norm.
Parents know what their kids look like when they're "in the zone" re: the thrill of learning something or developing their mastery of some skill. The real question is why they feel so helpless to find or create a situation where they're in that mode most of the time.
That's why god invented tall ships.
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