"ha ha ha just wait til the baby's born your life is gonna suck and you won't get any sleep" how about go fuck yourself
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Replying to @selentelechia
Gotta say, "what life is like for the first months with the first baby" is one of the least homogenous collections of anecdotes I have
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Replying to @webdevMason @selentelechia
FWIW, the last new daddy I talked to said both he and his wife were overwhelmed with the disparity between the joy they felt vs. the hell they were told to expect — and he was a pretty overworked high-level primary school employee, not someone with so much bandwidth to spare
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Replying to @webdevMason @selentelechia
1 y.o. now, first weeks were ~blissful. Later, handling colic-type distress every evening was emotionally & cognitively very challenging, but somehow okay. I wasn’t really prepared for the sustained lack of personal autonomy but c’est la vie. Twitter kind of helps.
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It’s not like you help someone prepare by just telling them it’s awful. Some real personal stories might be good to hear. A book like “All Joy and No Fun” was actually pretty good to read; it helped me not think I was necessarily a bad person for sometimes loathing parenting.
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Now that I think about it, I think what would help is some clearer way of thinking about what having a child is and “why” you do it, when it’s not economically-materially “necessary.” This gets into existential, religious, ontological territories and is kind of a strange question
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It's murky AF. You're digging deep into the hardware there.
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Replying to @webdevMason @selentelechia
Yeah and nobody told me hey bro prepare to have your lifelong assumptions derived from liberal individualism gradually destroyed leaving you confused about the basic purpose of doing anything and what life satisfaction means
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