After years of observation and study, I've concluded that the typical straight male goes through much — if not all — of his life quite deeply confused about why any woman would like *him* or the things he would like to do with and/or to her
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I can't even tell my gf she's pretty too often , 'cause it sets off a parade of negative voices inside her that I really can't protect her from .
End of conversation
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My gf always says "I'm not pretty, look at this girl!" To which I reply "You are. You're not the prettiest on the PLANET, but you *are* several standard deviations above the average look, which makes you pretty." To which she replies with a "I'm going to slap you now" glare

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