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Slight improvements on the "personal character" model are increasingly in play — the medical model, with a shocking comfort with using powerful controlled substances on boys as young as 4 or 5, or the socio-emotional model, where scripts are used to suppress behavior gently
The problem is that these all *suppress* behavior. We're overdue for a mastery model that offers a framework in which natural tendencies toward energetic physicality and aggression unlock better and better play. Martial arts & sports are examples, rarely offered to the very young
The best opportunities for mastery don't rely on frameworks designed by adults, but it's difficult to get anyone on board with this. Throwing your little hellions outside until they've worn themselves out on their own terms feels like it belongs to an impossibly distant era
And girls who are insufficiently good at reading social cues, quiet, self-effacing, gentle, and considerate are systemically subject to contempt and punishment from teachers and students. But for some reason Quillette isn’t publishing, and Pinker isn’t tweeting, about that.
Sex differences in teacher perception and classroom interventions are just really, really easy to study, and have been studied extensively. But it's true that "social skills" as colloquially understood look like a big mediating factor, and girls have substantial variation too
This is an aside, but I think your tweets (especially on this topic) are probably the main thing thats keeping me on Twitter these days.
Started karate when I was 5 — so much fun. The first time I felt like being small (10th percentile in size before puberty) was no competitive hindrance. The perfect blend of freedom & precision.
It's impressive how comprehensively we fuck this up. Those who aren't as much into the physical aspect or just express it differently are often derided to no end, as it's seen as core to being a boy. Those who do like the physicality are also derided for being themselves 
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