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Extreme aloofness does speak to a more common pathology in women than clinginess, but in general "hack this pathology" is the wrong lens to take when looking for someone with whom to build a life or family
All that said, I'm definitely more into the "let's dream our flight beyond the stars together" sort of passion than the "somebody's house might get burnt to the ground" sort of passion, and YMMV I guess
One is lasting, terrifying, and rare, the other fleeting and relatively safe. Good luck finding them both I guess.
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