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Don't forget "kajillion-dollar college fund" & "careers so hard-won you'll never actually see the kids." There's a big pity/shame/status-killer culture re: needing help as a family w/ kids. It'd be great if we could assume this is a normal thing to occasionally befall a family.https://twitter.com/newbury_eric/status/1137775934608683014 …
In a world where the pre-requisites for basic functioning are expensive (home near jobs, car, etc.), those pre-reqs are going to be ongoing obligations (rent/mortgage, lease, etc.) for most people. A shame culture re: needing help will create great risk anxiety, & kids are risky
More people would have kids & those families would be less stressful environments if it just were considered typical for some portion of the community to need some help, and very little was made of who happened to fall into that portion any given year
We also put a ton of weight on ‘independence’ as a basic function of adulthood when many other cultures just embrace multigenerational homes when raising children. Not available for everyone, but that should be seen as a positive and not a failing.
We also push moving out of your parents house as the first step towards adulthood, and too many people do it too early from social pressure and end up spending a decade+ financially insecure as a result. If having kids means prolonging that, many people will just choose ‘no’.
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