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Some things I've noticed from hanging out with kids but trying to refrain from telling them what to do or stop doing: - They're less efficient but more generative - They invite you to see more of what they do - They less frequently try to use you as a weapon (e.g. "snitching")
(Although I have seen some very creative new flavors of snitching, e.g. "I have a pet peeve, do you want to hear it?" ["Yes."] "...so-and-so always leaves his things on the table by the power outlets. It's SO annoying.")
Thinking a lot about the pros & cons of top-down behavior policing... there's some friction when kids have to negotiate *with each other* to keep noise down or share things/space, but they usually figure it out (not always fairly). This seems like pretty important social practice
These social negotiations can be REALLY stressful. I think a lot of adults who supervise children intervene by default because it does take pressure off the kids. But the stress is usually short-lived & as long as kids can escape/decompress as needed they seem to bounce back fast
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