“Nice” v. “Jerk” was probably never a particularly useful axis for understanding women’s sexual attraction
AFAICT, the early 2000s feminist blogosphere redefined a lot of archetypal masculine behavior as abusive, then *also* made fun of "nice guys" for pointing out that women seem to sorta like some of that stuff. If you don't accept the masculine = jerk axiom, the rest falls apart
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It still comes as a surprise to a lot of men that women also *like a challenge*. Young women first find the existence of jerks in their dating vicinity a surprise, and then... "hold my beer". "He can't *not* like me!" Nothing like taming a wild man all for yourself, right?
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Likewise, it's surprising to a lot of women that men like to be explicitly wanted/appreciated. Typical mind fallacy? Women have an overabundance of (often unwanted) sexual attention, men have the opposite problem, & they both try to give each other what they want *themselves*
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