I actually think it’s critical to care *deeply* what other people think, but choose those people carefully — only people you’d consider your *teachers*! If someone has the power to easily punish or reward you, that person is your teacher whether you’d endorse it or not
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The idea I understand, I think, but not the word shame. What does shame mean to you in that sentence? I wouldn't feel ashamed though sure, I'll do my best to avoid it happening ever again once I realise the issue.
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The fault in abusing a relationship of influence lies with the person abusing it, not the rcpt. It's not that hard to carefully nurture ppl you have power over instead of abuse them. Although many seem to have convinced themselves abuse is the only way to lead others to change.
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