Have you noticed that trust and friendship are rarely transitive?
Most introductions don’t work out
Your friend’s spouse is unlikely to become your spouse’s friend
Your kid’s friend’s parent is unlikely to become yours
Exception: kids make friends with your friends’ kids
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Your kid’s friend’s parent is highly unlikely to become your parent. Or your kid.
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The most efficient way I know of to find excellent friends is to find my most excellent friends and ask them to recommend their most excellent friends to me. Works everytime.
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I have a feeling you’d get strong unwanted filter effects that way. People who rate their friends on excellence sound vaguely off-putting to me
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If it works for kids but not adults, maybe it's not a transitive issue, but a openness/willingness one?
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You’re citing as examples relations which are not friendships, but marriages, work relationships and blood relationships (though I agree with your broader point on trust).
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I’m finding that building relationships with the parents of my kids’ school friends to be a challenge. My parents became good friends with some of my friends’ parents, but that was in a smaller city.
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Friendship is frequently based on proximity. Otherwise you don't spend enough time together.
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You can never know beforehand though which kid's friend's parents will turn out to be great friends of yours, or which introduction will lead to an amazing opportunity: I think in these cases you have to increase the noise to find the signals.
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