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// Prompts closed. I got organized on a spreadsheet. Here's a list of all prompts, and a composition sheet I'll work on. This is rather challenging fiction-writing kata for me. The list is also very revealing...about something. I have 104, so may drop up to 5 to hit my 99 goal.pic.twitter.com/l7AuxniSky
// Open call -- once I've posted my entry on a prompt, feel free to jump in and try to top mine by responding to that specific one with your own. I'm kinda in learning/practice mode here, so those of you who are better than me at this game can hopefully school me.
4/ Many had vanished, taken away, coughing, by the health workers in their vans. Yet the sense of chronic doom had lifted from Skid Row, replaced by a dark elation. "At least something is changing" thought Joey, leaning against his ancient shopping cart.https://twitter.com/scrivenix/status/1339039857025318912?s=20 …
5/ An evangelical Christian missionary was trying to convert an atheist software engineer. "You know why you should really join us? Because the Christian God is the alpha and the omega!" "What difference does that make?" "He's a full-stack god!"https://twitter.com/wbic16/status/1339060418128572419?s=20 …
// I give up on 'kilt' ... can't think of a joke or story. This is going to be one of the 4-5 I can afford to pass on.https://twitter.com/Malcolm_Ocean/status/1339047982918864897?s=20 …
6/ Tired of hearing "corporations are not people," Galt, Inc developed an AI to design an anthropomorphic representation of itself based on internal data and employee photos. Unfortunately, no matter how they tuned it, the AI only generated lizard faces.https://twitter.com/dpvintin/status/1339197314586513410?s=20 …
7/ Q: Why did the philosophical zombie skip the inverted spectrum question on the philosophy of mind final exam? A: He was unqualiafied to answerhttps://twitter.com/siyagule/status/1339103671976603649?s=20 …
8/ Through the dirty windows of the Covid-shuttered bakery, the empty display cases, once full of scrumptious cookies, were visible. Camped under the awning, a derelict homeless woman watched a rerun of the Hallmark Christmas movie she'd once starred in.https://twitter.com/ben_mathes/status/1339070560379265024?s=20 …
9/ The man with a hook for a hand, his face dark under the hood of his anorak, limped slowly down the rainy pier, his wellingtons squelching in the puddles. At the end of the pier, a woman in the wet dress screamed, "Help! I'm being murdered by a cliche!"https://twitter.com/gravity_levity/status/1339057186039881729?s=20 …
10/ The mayor swore to get 100% of the town vaccinated, and after a mighty effort, it was done. But after the last person in town was vaccinated, with much fanfare, a great melancholy descended on the town. Things had returned to normal.https://twitter.com/shanebreslin/status/1339130960709885954?s=20 …
11/ "Wise master, I aspire to goodness, but evil surrounds me. What should I do?" asked the seeker. "There is no certainty of grace in this life," the master replied sadly, "All we can do is take notes on the evil around us, and review them weekly."https://twitter.com/fortelabs/status/1339040174114631680?s=20 …
12/ "Sir, the AI has locked into a self-improvement recursion and has locked the bunker doors. It has enough backup power to launch the missiles!" "Isn't MacGyver in there?" "Yes sir, but it's no use. The AI has collected all the paperclips!"https://twitter.com/arunshroff/status/1339118476280082434?s=20 …
13/ “What the hell happened here?” the alien ambassador asked. “A mad emperor, aided by venal aristocrats, pandered to the paranoid insecurities of a crazed, conspiratorial religious mob, and 300,000 people died.” “And what do you call this system of government?” “Democracy!”https://twitter.com/SunilMalhotra/status/1339065882744524800 …
14/ Joe looked up at the canopy, letting the shade-filtered sun wash over him. He closed his eyes, and breathed in a deep lungful of the forest air. “What did you say this forest bathing thing was called Hiroaki?” A bird fluttered overhead. Plop. “That version? Shirin Yucku”https://twitter.com/Erthelillo/status/1339059593004113923 …
15/ Q: What happens when a haunted mansion decides it no longer wants to be your friend? A: It ghosts you.https://twitter.com/swarroup/status/1339061796821331969 …
16/ “The problem, Karen, is that your life is out of alignment with the universe. That’s why you got canceled. Yoga can’t fix that.” “Do you mean my chakras? Should I try meditation? A juice cleanse?” “No, I mean you’re a lawful evil soul trapped in a chaotic neutral world.”https://twitter.com/michaeljelly/status/1339178508388618244 …
17/ Q: Why did the burrito publish a manifesto on Medium? A: It was a Mission Burritohttps://twitter.com/uberstuber/status/1339040854296547328 …
18/ What did the CBC reporter say when the Canadian airship carrying a cargo of maple syrup crashed in Toronto, leaving the shoes of millions all sticky. "Oh, the viscosity!"https://twitter.com/riemannzeta/status/1339043921704275968 …
19/ How can you fix the bad posture of the leaning tower of Pisa? Use the Christopher Alexander techniquehttps://twitter.com/m_ashcroft/status/1339158519627599872 …
20/ The physicist made a time machine that could only travel to the future after 1992, but soon got bored. All future times seemed alike. “Why don’t you make a parallel universe portal gun instead?”Fukuyama suggested. “No use. The end-of-history multiverse is ergodic.”https://twitter.com/TaylorPearsonMe/status/1339041026946854912 …
21/ The famine was in its third year. The royal granaries were finally empty. The starving citizens gathered around the palace. “We demand to see the king!” they said. The queen appeared on the balcony, tearfully smacking her lips. “I’m sorry, there’s only one leg left.”https://twitter.com/suck_macaque/status/1339055546977009665 …
22/ Q: What do you call it when you go brrrr while in quarantine? A: Cabin fervor.https://twitter.com/MyndiMind/status/1339059246726598658 …
23/ Q: Where can you be religious without being irrational? A: A Bayesian Prioryhttps://twitter.com/prayagdesale/status/1339055600047517696 …
24/ The market had reached saturation. No amount of marketing seemed to drive up sales. After another grim quarter, the Gillette division head made the call. “We have no choice. Prepare the announcement. We are adding another blade.”https://twitter.com/AIsakovic1/status/1339041878088556545 …
25/ There was no cover, so the victim had no choice but to try to run from the sniper, trying to dodge. But he got shot anyway. Unfortunately he was in a zigzagzugzwang.https://twitter.com/bharatchaganty/status/1339065899190374400 …
26/ The giant sat outside the Galt Bar, drinking and raging about how parasitism was destroying the world. Finally he downed an entire barrel at once and passed out. “What’s with him?” Hank Rearden asked John Galt. “Atlas chugged,” Galt shrugged.https://twitter.com/pee_zombie/status/1339045467871698948 …
27/ Election results on the planet Lolcowia had been delayed yet again, as losers in every race alleged conspiracies. The galactic council ambassador began shopping for souvenirs and packing his bags. “We’re shutting down the embassy. This planet is down for the recount.”https://twitter.com/atomheartcow/status/1339122269432451073 …
// Hmm. This galactic ambassador character has potential for longer stories. He’s already appeared in 3 jokes.
28/ After a strenuous series of delicate, high-profile missions, the galactic ambassador landed on the pre-contact backwater planet Tradu for a vacation out of the spotlight. “It’s a retconocracy,” he explained to reporters. “Nostalgia fields so strong, they can’t see me.”https://twitter.com/Aravindh_R/status/1339057175105171457 …
29/ “Ambassador, you’ve been roving the Galaxy for 150 years, visiting 1000s of planets for Galactic Council missions. How do you stay organized?” “I use an online zettelkasten hyperspatial memory.” “But what if the ansible link is slow to load?” “Oh, then I use Moleskines.”https://twitter.com/beauhaan/status/1339138504845000705 …
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