I've never met anyone in my life who didn't know something unique and special that no one else I know knows.
I wish you all shared your beautiful ideas more freely! We're here to listen ✨
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It’s often hard to know what we have that is unique and special!
People should spend more time *telling someone what their special knowledge is* to help them see it
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Something about people doing that rubs me the wrong way. They’re often badly wrong and it ends up being annoying rather than flattering. A better strategy is to let them know how something they said/did benefitted you and leave the reflecting on strengths to them.
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If someone tells me their take and they’re badly wrong, I either know right away and/or I have an avenue for a specific reevaluation. It can be both annoying and productive in this case
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My heuristic is basically the praise/positive version of this thing called the SBI method of criticism/negative feedback. Mature adults typically dislike identity pigeonholing in both directions. mindtools.com/pages/article/
I think we’re describing different scenarios
my model for this scenario is:
- I want this type of advice and see how it is useful to me
- I respect the person’s judgement and/or knowledge of me
- I want there to be an easy/safe way to receive advice from them on my strengths
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Yeah, that’s a rarer situation in the right kind of relationship. Like when I finished thesis, my advisor said by way of parting advice something like “you have originality” which others before/since have said. Powerful validation coming from him, meh/negative from most people.
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