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So... snark aside, is there a name for this behavior? Mostly seen in amateur psychologists and bad professional ones? I'm thinking a term of art that captures an idea like "self-image preserving cognitions" or "growth-minimizing cognition"
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Psychology: the literary art of understanding others in ways that minimize your need to understand yourself.
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And I'm not talking about projection, which is a special case of this general category I'm talking about, and specific to Freudian-derived frames of analysis. I'm talking just generally analyzing interpersonal situations in ways that minimize your own imperative to change.
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I'm very sensitive to this because I explicitly adopt this approach in working with sparring clients in my consulting, which is the opposite of therapy. The operating assumption is "you're ok, I'm ok, the problem is everybody else", which is often a good default for consulting.