had a conversation with my wife about some of my meta-commentary and posting, and I was kinda surprised to find that even she, who knows me much better than almost everyone else, including me in some aspects, didn't entirely appreciate/understand why I do what I do
Conversation
I'm not going to pretend that I'm some sort of 4d chessmaster or strategic genius.
I just have a pretty straightforward long-term goal: I'm trying to make friends with ambitious, thoughtful nerds over a 70-year horizon.
that's really it
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I've said this out loud a few times, but maybe it's not clear what that means? it means I will do things like defend people I dislike and disagree with, if I think that they're being unfairly treated. It invites a lot of tedious dumb shit in the moment, but Real Friends Recognize
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this isn't from some sort of position of moral superiority or anything like that. I'm Just Some Guy. to me it's just plainly obvious that each time you add One Real Friend to your social graph, your net power level increases so much, you have to re-plot the whole graph
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I have been consistent about this for years & I intend to be consistent about this for decades... I will probably make mistakes and slip up from time to time, etc, am a fallible imperfect human, bla bla. but if you've watched me you can see how this works
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When you put something out in the public realm, the reaction is something like:
80% ignore it
15% engage superficially
3% shitty assholes
1% useful feedback
1% new friends
That final 1-2% is worth wading through all the shit for, at least for me, with no inherited ingroup/tribe
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seriously there are no surprises here, I have no cards up my sleeve. but I have a plan. the plan is to find the others. and I find the others by being the person I'd be delighted to discover. that's... really it
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Sometimes you might see me tweet something and wonder “why is he tweeting that, he’s inviting ridicule”. I thought long and hard about it and decided it’s generally worth crawling through 100 assholes to reach 1 good person. This gives me a feeling of lightness & calm confidence
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Replying to
Loose assemblage of many things, but to you I’d say someone you can do good improv with
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Replying to
I’ve rarely dropped people because I can’t stand them at all, but frequently dropped them because of failure to reach mutual equilibrium (generally because they want to meet in person or talk on the phone far more than I can tolerate). Dislike failures vs impedance mismatch.
Replying to
Nice, I never want to have a phone call with you. I think meeting like once a decade would be nice
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