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vgr's profile
Venkatesh Rao
Venkatesh Rao
Venkatesh Rao
@vgr

Tweets

Venkatesh Rao

@vgr

Conversational account. For work follow @ribbonfarm, @breaking_smart, @artofgig. Tweets are 90% vacuous views, apathetically held. Mediocritopian. IKEA builder.

Los Angeles, CA
venkateshrao.com
Joined August 2007

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    1. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      I think many people fail at this because they approach other people’s problems with an “if I were you” starting point. But that’s changing the whole essence of the problem: them being not-you. Might as well suggest “If you were a spherical cow...”

      3 replies 4 retweets 69 likes
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    2. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      Why would your first step in solving a problem be replacing the most important part that you understand the least with an irrelevant substitute that you happen to understand the best?

      2 replies 6 retweets 50 likes
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    3. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      This is the “yes, and...” improv approach to being changed. It’s also Miller’s law applied to accepting subjective postures at face value. Assume their life posture is valid and ask what circumstances it could be valid for. Then look for ways to change the circumstances.

      1 reply 1 retweet 34 likes
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    4. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      One sign you’re doing it right (or it’s being done right to you): the change is somewhat unpredictable. A whole life reorientation/reconfiguration. Not a simple stimulus-response or a cause effect goal-pursuit effect. This is not incentive shift in a fixed solution structure.

      1 reply 0 retweets 23 likes
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    5. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      It’s an equilibrium shift. They’re restating and resolving their “life” problem in a new way around shifted constraints. Neither you, nor they know where they’ll land. It won’t be a simple “they’ll do more X, less Y” or “X instead of Y”. They’ll reinvent who they are.

      1 reply 0 retweets 20 likes
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    6. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      True even for deceptively structured life changes like hiring someone away from another company. They aren’t just changing jobs for more money, to do the same thing for more. They’re usually reconfiguring their “life” solution.

      2 replies 1 retweet 21 likes
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    7. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      Significance of this: positive change in a life usually means more creative freedom. Results unpredictable. You can go the other way with children or insecure adults (Ie add or tighten constraints to change their life solutions) but doing it to competent adults is coercion.

      1 reply 0 retweets 22 likes
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    8. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      The only situation where it’s difficult to operate this way in is when the other person is a close/intimate part of your life. Because in that case your life solutions are entangled. You can’t shift a constraint in theirs without shifting it in yours as well.

      1 reply 0 retweets 21 likes
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    9. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      This is codependency. You are part of their solution and they are part of yours. Change both or neither. And given the unpredictability, any shift could strengthen or weaken the connection itself.

      1 reply 0 retweets 19 likes
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    10. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      Life trajectory agency is like space mission orbit design agency. There’s a small delta vee onboard fuel budget to work with after launch, enough for small course corrections. All bigger moves have to come from gravity slingshots.

      1 reply 0 retweets 41 likes
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      Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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      Tip: if an idea seems to require “willpower”, don’t suggest it. “Willpower” is the phlogiston or luminiferous aether of life advice. There’s no such thing. It doesn’t exist. Show me a sudden shift in “willpower” levels and I’ll show you a constraint that has recently moved.

      9:44 PM - 14 Feb 2020
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      • Saravanan V phyphor edumurphy your favorite Jackie 🇪dith 🅱️inch Matt "allium respecter" Olson would-be author of deicide jimbob Professor* Harbinger #BlackLivesMatter
      7 replies 58 retweets 180 likes
        1. New conversation
        2. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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          Note. This thread is NOT about “changing incentives” in the economics sense. Changing incentives is about causing predictable changes driven by a fixed solution. That works for things like offering a discount to drive sales. Changing constraints causes an unpredictable re-solving

          1 reply 0 retweets 22 likes
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        3. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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          This is not a behaviorist approach OR a cognitivist approach. It’s a complex system gambling approach. You’re betting that disrupting an equilibrium is more likely to result in a better new one than worse. It’s a change-is-good bet.

          5 replies 1 retweet 41 likes
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        4. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr Feb 14
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          One last point. Assuming you understand the constraint structure of anyone’s life, even your own, from the legible part, is like assuming you can guess the shape of the submerged part of an iceberg from the 10% visible

          3 replies 5 retweets 37 likes
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        5. End of conversation
        1. New conversation
        2. Ben Reinhardt‏ @Ben_Reinhardt Feb 14
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          Replying to @vgr

          Wait, me telling people to eat less and exercise more *doesn’t* help them get in shape???

          2 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
        3. ykgoon.com‏ @ykgoon Feb 15
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          Replying to @Ben_Reinhardt @vgr

          Sadly and anecdotally, it actually does not 🙂 My advices sounds more like "you don't need me to tell you what to do..."

          0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
        4. End of conversation
        1. timberwind‏ @tim_ber_wind Feb 14
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          Replying to @vgr @CTZN5

          what if it can be trained over time like a muscle you'd see that someone just blurting "just dead them 4plate bro, 1rm!" wasn't helpful, but that doesn't mean the whole thing isn't real you gotta start where you are and take small steps so you don't tear something

          0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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        1.  🛡 🌸skydroid 🌸 🛡‏ @skydroid3 Feb 14
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          Replying to @vgr @StarlightNixie

          Same goes motivation. "You just don't have the motivation!" Is more often than not a red herring created to absolve the consequences of a systemic rot.

          0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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        1. Nebby Nebula‏ @Nebby_99 Feb 15
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          Replying to @vgr

          I read a thing saying it's also about whether you perceive there being a choice or not. "Wow that must have take willpower" "Well I had to do it, so" Not helpful but interesting.

          0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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