It’s really depressing how important it is to every person to be seen, no matter how obscure and unimportant, and how deeply they start to collapse when they’re not being seen. And older = worse. Most people don’t develop the inner resources to endure not being seen for long.
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And “seeing” work in service of people with nothing much to present is the most difficult kind of caring work. Relentlessly demanding, exhausting, and fundamentally unrewarding/thankless, even if you’re being paid. Reverse dementoring. Soul transfusion instead of soul sucking.
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Not proud to admit this, but I’m finding out my soul surplus available for seeing-caring work is extremely limited. I’m like a cellphone battery at 10% and red even at my best. In awe of people who seem to have 10x battery to go around soul-charging others.
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10% surplus for random other humans that is. More like 70-80% for selfish use.
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I've moved on from the narrative of being seen. Idk, from time to time, I think there's something more going on --
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woke: “social” technology is fragmenting the psyche and eroding human relationships
bespoke: “social” technology is breaking the monopoly of the single true self, unlocking new universes and higher Kegan stages
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Sadly it’s not a “narrative”. It’s a basic need and unconscious drive like eating that most people never reconstruct into anything else.
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Fwiw, one of my favorite passages from a novel was an elaborate description of how the main character engaged in a ritual opposite of a somatic-meditation, to piece by piece, vanish and become unseen even to himself, until he was reduced to an element
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I’m nit talking about public seeing. Most people are just seen by family/close friends.
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