Have you ever genuinely treated someone as a leader and followed their lead? What did “lead” and “follow” behaviors look like?
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Lead: Set the tone, set the objective, provide the foundation for action, arrange feedback/guidance, and stalwart backing if you stay squared away & in the right.
Follow: take action toward the objective without being dragged along, adapt to feedback, police yourself.
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Lead by example and proficiency.
Follow and shoulder the burden the best you can or else bring suffering to you and those around you.
Everyone is all in. No room for half-assery. High expectations all around.
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Listening to the captain on a sailboat during a race. Leading was knowing how to direct people, following was accepting that and chiming in with necessary info.
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Mostly just asked them for their advice and listened.
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Not really.
Part of that whole rational anarchist thing I got from Heinlein is that I don't take orders from anyone who isn't better armed than I am, and then only for long enough to get out of range.
Everything else is just suggestions, and I only take good suggestions.
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Yes though it took me a long time to learn to suspend my "I know better" tendency without also suspending my better judgement.
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Minus the sacred connotations of "leadership", there's a deep, underlying emotional transaction in a moment of "genuine" leading-and-following. Roughly, I think, the leader and followers all want and expect the leader to direct the will of the followers.
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