Interestingly there is nothing like wog epistemology (“brown sahib” Indian —> European going native) for STEM —> HSS. I’ve never met a STEMMie so in awe of critical theory that they accept access to HSS discourses with deferential gratitude and abandonment of subversive impulses.
Conversation
So, tldr of my 2 immigration stories: I never self-essentialized as Indian or wog-Westerner, or as STEMMie doerist or HSS critical-theory supremacist.
This has been the reward for a spectacularly mediocre 22-year adult career along all conventional vectors of accomplishment.
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The consolation of mediocre success at life’s games around big prizes is an identity too small to obscure your view of where and how your feet are on the ground.
Immigration story #1 makes me incapable of ethnonationalist sentiment on *any* side that might accept me as a member.
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Immigration story #2 makes me incapable of being either a Singularitarian worshipping at the altar of Roko’s basilisk OR a desperate humanist worshipping at the altar of the “indomitable human spirit” and writing really bad takes on AI illustrated by Terminator stock photos.
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But to bring it back full circle (I went from general idea about views of rivals to nation/species level examples down to personal) the point of my original “ladder of assertions” tweet is that “success epistemologies” are “big frozen identity” epistemologies and are unsatisfying
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Everybody I know operating with a success epistemology based on attachment to a big, self-essentialized identity seems to be unhappy about it, even as they strut about performing confidence and satisfaction in how they view the world.
Their world view is more wall than window.
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Underneath the performance: something between frantic denial and deep depression. My reaction to the performance peppered with obvious tells that it is not the felt reality underneath is usually some flavor of “methinks the derper doth protest too much”.
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I have my own dissatisfactions, denials, and depressive responses to life, but thankfully being attached to the ladder of assertions about others abilities is not one of the sources. Which is good because it allows my worldview to be more window than wall, and I like a good view.
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Great thread! I can see now that some of what originally attracted me to your writing was that STEMy look at HSS topics.
Now I’m trying to imagine if there’s a “de-essentialization” ladder. I suppose it feels like a downer first until it picks up a bit towards calm mediocrity?
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6-u: “Indomitable __ spirit!”
** CRASH**
6-d. Kubler-Ross grieving for your own social death
5-d. Dark nihilist humor
4-d. Compassion for failure
3-d. Discovery of infinite-gaming
2-d. Embrace of mediocrity/appreciation of all life
1-d: Solipsistic contentment
Replying to
Yup! Makes sense. A bit like self-hype cycle. I feel around 4-d, now. Although, like your own story, I don't think I (and we, mexicans) really went through the pre-crash self-essentialization ladder, except maybe for small periodic crashes. Thanks!
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