Bender: "Like everything else in life, pumping is just a primitive, degenerate form of bending."
What’s your “bending”? Your ur-way way of doing/becoming?
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Doing impossible things, badly.
i.e. hexayurt isn't *that nice* a house. is a new, new thing, but wow the early versions are going to be basic.
And so on
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I overthink and calculate and risk hedge at others and the world around me rather than let myself acknowledge what I feel. It’s from old wounds from risking much in love and career and getting burned. It’s a defense. I’m working on it. I’m not yet what I could be.
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I feel better about half-assing things if I describe it as "satisficing" :-)



