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vgr's profile
Venkatesh Rao
Venkatesh Rao
Venkatesh Rao
@vgr

Tweets

Venkatesh Rao

@vgr

This is my conversational account. For my work follow @ribbonfarm, @breaking_smart, @artofgig. Tweets are 90% vacuous views, apathetically held. Mediocritopian.

Los Angeles, CA
venkateshrao.com
Joined August 2007

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    1. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr 27 Jul 2019
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      Dealing with people for whom being respected/disrespected is a big deal feels really awkward, like writing with my left hand. I have to kinda model them in some sort of janky emulation mode. I can detect respect/disrespect but don’t have a strong response to it. 🤔

      5 replies 5 retweets 47 likes
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    2. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr 27 Jul 2019
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      Being respected is convenient and sometimes eases things, like TSA Precheck. Being disrespected sometimes creates annoying extra hurdles to navigate like being profiled, which I dislike, but if it is just disrespect without any practical effects, hard for me to summon a reaction

      2 replies 0 retweets 15 likes
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    3. Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr 27 Jul 2019
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      Interaction I’ve occasionally had with petty bureaucrat types: 1: They disrespect me without consequences 2: I don’t react beyond, keep my end civil 3: They get mad and escalate to add hurdles 4: I address hurdles but still have no genuine reaction 5. Now they’re really mad...

      2 replies 0 retweets 23 likes
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      Venkatesh Rao‏ @vgr 27 Jul 2019
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      Sometimes I think if I were a good enough actor to fake a slight reaction at step 1 I could avoid the escalation. Disrespect seems to often be a plea for recognition/respect in the form of a humiliation/anger performance.

      2:37 PM - 27 Jul 2019
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      • aiyyoshiva Buster Benson anna clemencia guerrero hewhocutsdown Marek Bernát Vincent Murphy Brian Holdefehr Jonathan Grant Coolerator
      5 replies 1 retweet 29 likes
        1. Peter N Limberg‏ @peternlimberg 27 Jul 2019
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          I feel what you mean. My sense is that some bureaucrats believe they are entitled to be recognized for their inflated and overcompensating importance. Treating them with run-of-the-mill civility is an insult.

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        1. Ben Ford‏ @boothead 27 Jul 2019
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          I think Gavin de Becker and Rory Miller have the measure of this. They call it the monkey dance and the group monkey dance. So much of what goes on isn't what really goes on.

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        1. Dran Fren‏ @GlobalComplexit 27 Jul 2019
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          Why do they disrespect you in the first place?

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        1. damian‏ @damian0815 27 Jul 2019
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          Replying to @vgr

          disrespect can be an effective control mechanism for people who do have a reaction to it (which is probably most people). if a ruleset doesn’t explicitly include your use-case, whether or not a beurocrat respects you can determine whether or not you get what you need.

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        1. Maynard Handley‏ @handleym99 27 Jul 2019
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          Replying to @vgr

          Maybe carry a laminated card saying “I am autistic and not good at reading facial expressions. If you need something from me, please say so explicitly”? I’m kinda curious to see how that would work. Maybe make life much more pleasant?

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