it pains me, but I think it might be a good idea to close my DMs (so that only mutuals can message me) I feel pretty sad about getting to the point where there are more requests for my attention than I have attention to give... although obviously that comes with benefits as well
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the weird or undesirable messages that I get don't seem to be related to my gender and youth, although it's impossible to disentangle
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another variable that makes a huge difference is "softness". people like to DM soft people. venkat's persona is literally the opposite of soft; he talks about sparring. ie people DM sonyas hoping to be stroked, people DM venkats hoping to be sparred
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My dms have been open for a while and I only get like one whacko message every few weeks or so. Otherwise mostly mutuals message me anyway.
Demand for my attention is going down. It will happen to you too. 
