The elegant thing is, people don't want to introduce shady opportunist types to their trusted friends and coworkers. They want to introduce someone they genuinely respect, trust, admire. So you have to be all of those things. I've been reflecting on that: what IS the distinction?
Conversation
I think the distinction is something like "sensitivity + effort".
When I make a referral, whether it's to help a friend get a date, or an employee, or a co-founder, I want to know that the person I'm referring will be sensitive to them + the situation, and make a good effort
1
14
Here's a thread I'm eager to grow: a list of conversations I've had with Twitter friends IRL. I would not have gotten to know some of these people without this approach
Quote Tweet
Meeting internet friends from around the world is always a huge highlight of my life and fills me with a lot of gratitude. Despite the wanton amounts of rampant fuckery on here, there are good, fun, kind, interesting people worth hanging out with
Show this thread
1
11
This is also kind of relevant. To me, executing this strategy means putting in a lot of work. It means replying to every single comment you get. See my replies, I basically reply almost everyone always (unless it seems really bad-faith or incomprehensible)
Quote Tweet
That I am very open to answering questions, having conversations, etc. My time and attention is very free-to-public at the moment, and still very underutilized. It won’t always be like this. I am a free resource, use me twitter.com/amandadeibert/…
Show this thread
1
14
Circling back: so what am I really saying here? If there are people that you admire, you can actually become friends with them(!) You just gotta know who you gotta win over, and then you gotta put in the work. That's how I think about it. Contribute value 💪🏾
1
18
Btw when I say "high-value, high-quality followers" I'm talking about people who are
- kind
- sensitive
- thoughtful
- think and write clearly
- ask interesting questions
- share interesting links & suggestions
Look at the list of people I'm following, they're mostly fantastic
2
27
Btw check this out: I have a post on my blog where I maintain a list of interesting reads. I share this post with people whenever it's appropriate to do so, ie when someone asks for recommendations. I have MADE FRIENDS THIS WAY. Behold: twitter.com/search?q=from%
1
14
Seriously, it blows my mind sometimes. There's a web page on the internet with a list of hyperlinks in it, and when I share it in an appropriate context, people want to become my friends. It's pretty wild. I wrote myself a wingman and he lives on the interwebs
2
1
27
Also just remembered I once had a conversation with a younger friend who wanted some networking advice, and I copy+pasted that into a blogpost. There's some extra nuance here
3
13
If this thread gets about maybe 50-100 RTs, I'm going to start getting people calling me out as an amoral sociopath. Would be fun to wake up to 😂 G'night fam, take care of yourselves and be excellent to each other ❤️
4
1
19
Replying to
What if you’re neither a Frank Underwood, nor a Freddie? I think I’m in between 🤔

