Conversation

An underrated dynamic in the gender wars is that not all conversational tactics are open to everybody. In particular, tactics men constantly use on each other, and laugh off, are seen as crushingly emasculating and humiliating when used by women on men.
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As I was arguing with Sonya, I think that’s rational. If you’re the only female engineer in a team of 50, then any imputed ignorance is much more dangerous for you since the 49 men will draw dumb n=1 conclusions etc. In a majority-women context, the mansplainer would look silly.
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There’s a law of large numbers here. When you’re part of a small sample, you’re far more on guard with yourself and others in the small sample, since the marginal reputation all damage to all from the actions of one are high. Large sample = statistical security.
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