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Nick Douglas
@toomuchnick
Let's not mince hairs. Author of "A Sharp Knife Is Safer" and co-creator of the audio sitcom "Roommate From Hell"
Brooklyn, NYlinktr.ee/nickdouglasJoined July 2006

Nick Douglas’s Tweets

I did it again, I read this site for five minutes and started arguing with strangers about strangers. This place is so fucking dumb
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Why have our mass movements failed? Why has America become soft and compliant? It was the lead paint. Bring back the lead paint
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i will never forget the commercial for this that featured hotel guests cheerfully pointing at chewbacca to rat him out to stormtroopers, who promptly arrest him
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Disney World’s immersive Star Wars hotel will shut down in September polygon.com/23729103/disne
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where a normal journalist might say something like "he seems smart and when i asked him what he was reading at the moment he had what seemed like a real answer" she reacts to everything like a medieval peasant who's just been shown an ipad
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When I'm Velma Kelly and Matron "Mama" Morton
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Most people don't know how to behave, and it's exhausting and depressing. They don't have basic manners. They're not considerate. They have no empathy. They're not bad people but still, they suck.
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and PLEASE take 30 seconds and checkout this Borges-inspired read about a guy who works at, and is fired from, an infinite library
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My short story "Zeno's Library" is now an episode of the @rossgsutherland podcast Imaginary Advice. It's George Saunders meets Jorge Luis Borges. SoundCloud: soundcloud.com/ross-sutherlan iTunes: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/96- Spotify: open.spotify.com/episode/4xuCSh
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A mother must be everywhere and nowhere, the roar of thunder and a whisper in the wind. She must never attempt to win by force what can be won by deception. In the midst of chaos, there is also opportunity
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There’s this weird parenting advice trend that somehow combines “you should be like Scandinavian moms who leave their babies to nap in lüfgaards, big holes in the snow, but also if you don’t bedshare, babywear, and stop working your children will be traumatized”
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Austrians fumbled the bag so bad when it came to transforming their dynastic empire into a modern multicultural nation-state that they assume you can just list your fourteen points and any great power will immediately collapse into dozens of irrelevant statelets.
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I put China to notice - if you do not break with Russia - #ExRussia you will be dismantled into #ExChina Do you want this? ⁦@ChinaDaily
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no it just means being good at art doesn’t necessarily carry any special understanding of politics or insight into them, which is something that artists and the artist-adjacent are constantly in denial about
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nothing exemplifies the vapid posturing of a lot of “creative” types during the trump era better than childish gambino dropping this and then joining the andrew yang campaign the following year twitter.com/oscos/status/1…
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My trick is that I'm uncomfortable being *anywhere*
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"Legacy pubs realized ... there was no particular secret sauce to Buzzfeed or Gawker besides being made by & for people who were comfortable being online at a moment when existing pubs (& their execs) weren’t" maxread.substack.com/p/buzzfeed-gaw
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I'm starting to hope the historians actually won't have to understand Twitter at all
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if there are any historians in the future they will have to understand how twitter worked and they will have to get to grips with the exact moment when the meaning of "bluecheck" as a pejorative changed overnight twitter.com/Bowsnonk/statu
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Every viral tweet now has like 9 followups from the author like: My husband got me flowers! I wanted to clarify my husband and I do equal housework I did not know tulip farms were so bad for the environment, sorry I apologize that this was insensitive to people with allergies
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