Timothy SimonsVerified account

@timothycsimons

Actor. Doesn't like cocaine but likes songs about cocaine. Maine / Chicago / Los Angeles. Instagram: timothycsimons

Los Angeles, CA
291K Vine Loops
Joined January 2009
1,476 Photos and videos Photos and videos

Tweets

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  1. Pinned Tweet
    Oct 12

    When this becomes too much, I think of Ted Cruz endorsing Trump seemingly moments before it all went to absolute shit. That makes me happy.

    1,721 retweets 6,410 likes
  2. 14 hours ago

    Hillary's emails would literally have to say this for it to be a close call.

    6,276 retweets 11,298 likes
  3. 8 hours ago

    My costume today is acting w/ the blind confidence it took Ryan Lochte to add the 'gun to my head whatever' detail to his pee story.

    14 retweets 116 likes
  4. 10 hours ago

    Been informed I am spelling his last name wrong. Good news is the ppl I will be calling Jason Patrick will not know that by sound alone.

    37 likes
  5. 10 hours ago

    Starting today I'm making a commitment to calling any dude that kinda looks like Jason Patrick 'Jason Patrick'.

    31 likes
  6. 10 Oct 2014

    Halloween stores fill abandoned Blockbusters like a hermit crab taking a shell. Life finds a way.

    3,464 retweets 5,823 likes
  7. 11 hours ago

    Pass.

    Watch Cubs superfan Eddie Vedder sing at the World Series
    5 retweets 62 likes
  8. 11 hours ago

    . 👋🏼👋🏼👋🏼

    8 retweets 89 likes
  9. 15 hours ago

    This, from Veep writer Andy, is fantastic and I'm gonna start using all of them. Starting w/ bycicile cut. Please @ me ones that you use.

    Scriptwriting people! I'm looking to update my glossary of writers' terminology. Any of yours I could add to this?
    5 retweets 40 likes
  10. 17 hours ago

    I hope you'll join me at 3 NY time for a Halloween AMA at Reddit. See you there?

    57 retweets 266 likes
  11. Oct 30

    Chapman in like ten minutes

    23 retweets 57 likes
  12. Oct 30

    Rizzo out here doing the 'cool dad saying hello to your best friend' thing.

    1 retweet 15 likes
  13. Oct 30

    Holy sh*t. Harry Reid letter to Comey: you have explosive information about ties between Trump and the Russian govt

    8,258 retweets 8,911 likes
  14. Oct 30

    1 retweet 10 likes
  15. 29 Apr 2014

    Damn son, are you an audition? Cause I cried in a Starbucks after I blew you.

    184 retweets 637 likes
  16. 21 Oct 2015

    For Halloween, just tape a picture of your twitter avi to your forehead and tell everyone you're going as the worst version of yourself.

    764 retweets 1,318 likes
  17. Oct 30

    I hate to break it to anyone going out tonight, but your Stranger Things costume was played out by 9 PM yesterday.

    41 retweets 346 likes
  18. Oct 30

    fucking roasted

    5,466 retweets 16,270 likes
  19. Mar 31

    get you a man who can do both

    23 retweets 144 likes
  20. Oct 30

    The last line is PHD level shade.

    Own it, Trump supporters. This is your team.
    3 retweets 31 likes
  21. Oct 30

    OG

    2 retweets 10 likes

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