Tim CarvellVerified account

@timcarvell

Executive Producer of Last Week Tonight. Author of Planet Tad () and Return to Planet Tad (). Friendly.

New York
Joined February 2009
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  1. Pinned Tweet
    26 Sep 2017

    "There goes the baker with his tray like always -- the same old bread and rolls to sell!" Yes, Belle, why won't the baker invent new breads?

    7 replies 4 retweets 97 likes
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  2. Jan 25

    I am a talking frog who hosts and manages a variety program.

    Congratulations! The job you wanted to have when you were 5 is now yours. What do you now do for a living?
    3 replies 2 retweets 87 likes
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  3. Jan 24

    As the parent of a four-year-old, every single time someone calls the Mandalorian “Mando” I then have this song stuck in my head on a loop for the rest of the episode.

    1 reply 9 likes
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  4. Jan 24

    When your book report is due but you haven't done the reading.

    2:20
    To watch the first episode of Common Sense, please go to EP. 1: Since No Crimes Exist, It Must Be Dismissed
    3 retweets 11 likes
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  5. Jan 23

    Cancel every production number at this year’s Oscars and devote the time to a live, onstage interview with the executive who thought he could save “Dolittle” by adding a scene where Robert Downey, Jr. pulls a bagpipes out of a dragon’s anus.

    4 replies 8 retweets 51 likes
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  6. Jan 22

    This whole thread is worth a read, but if you don't have time: Transform Cincinnati does valuable work in providing clothes to transgender youth, and they need funding. Here's a short NPR story about them: And here's how to give:

    153. Last year cofounded a nonprofit called that gives clothes & makeovers to trans teens. It operated out of Nancy‘s bridal makeup business. They are having a fundraiser to move into their own space. Link:
    Show this thread
    3 likes
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  7. Retweeted
    Jan 20

    Badger badger badger badger badger badger... (Photo: John Connor Press Associates)

    119 replies 1,594 retweets 9,783 likes
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  8. Jan 20

    You did what now?

    6 replies 4 retweets 57 likes
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  9. Jan 20

    The account suddenly mass-RT'ing every single tweet ever posted to the account is definitely cool and normal and nothing to worry about.

    4 replies 3 retweets 18 likes
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  10. Retweeted
    Jan 19

    From 2 years ago, but this is my first time seeing it. When you try to be racist in a language you don't know and suuuuuper fuck it up, lol.

    42 replies 274 retweets 1,233 likes
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  11. Retweeted
    Jan 18

    I may be new to the White House beat, but since the White House put this question verbatim in the official transcript, I think it's fair game:

    20 replies 598 retweets 1,940 likes
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  12. Jan 18

    Between “Unbelievable” and “John Mulaney and the Sack Lunch Bunch”, Netflix is making a strong case for putting Annaleigh Ashford in everything.

    3 replies 1 retweet 22 likes
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  13. Retweeted
    Jan 17

    My favorite Dolittle review excerpt: "At one point, Dolittle and company are welcomed aboard a new boat by a bearded man who announces “I’m Jeff!” and is never seen or mentioned again."

    13 replies 33 retweets 248 likes
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  14. Jan 17

    This is an A+ response to the news Ken Starr has joined the defense team.

    this is definitely an “are you fucking kidding me?” kinda day.
    2 replies 10 retweets 81 likes
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  15. Retweeted
    Jan 16

    Chances are, your feed here is full of paid ads for “free" basic tax filing. So we decided to put together a guide for prepping + filing your taxes *actually for free* Here's how to avoid falling into a trap.

    2 replies 92 retweets 146 likes
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  16. Jan 16

    Sometimes when watching YouTube videos of Sesame Street songs with my kid, it'll end with this image of Elmo with his eyes closed, revealing his furry eyelashes, and it weirds me out and I need it not to happen?

    3 replies 12 likes
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  17. Jan 15

    New York Times Oscar analysis, Jan. 15, 2020.

    1 retweet 20 likes
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  18. Retweeted
    Jan 11

    Harvest Mice inside Tulips (Photo: Miles Herbert )

    46 replies 2,152 retweets 8,578 likes
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  19. Jan 11

    Can’t decide if I should see “The Irishman” or wait for the Todd Phillips version where it’s the same movie but also the origin story for Captain Cold.

    2 replies 15 retweets 61 likes
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  20. Jan 11

    It’s weird to be present at the creation of an episode of “Reply All”.

    This was removed, but oh my god.
    Show this thread
    1 reply 12 likes
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  21. Retweeted
    Jan 10

    Literally just don’t make gay jokes

    36 replies 197 retweets 2,308 likes
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