Alec SulkinVerified account

@thesulk

Breaker of Swift Mustache Hairs

Los Angeles
Joined March 2009

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  1. Retweeted

    Stop letting your kids run around this Target like you're the fucking Lannisters.

  2. Just took the shit version of "8 Seconds"

  3. Retweeted

    I’ve never heard Unskinny Bop in a place I’ve wanted to be.

  4. Bill Cosby has a rapier wit. In fact, it may be the rapiest.

  5. Is anyone having a worse year than ? What a Pilsbury Doughfraud.

  6. If I was a producer on the movie, I would've had Michael Buffer at the premier to stand up and say, "Let's get ready to Trumbo!!!"

  7. Me: Not "I Will Survive" again. Me 45 seconds later: Now you see me! Somebody new...!

  8. You think I'm kidding about sleep? I ambien serious.

  9. I am thankful for The Knick. I am thankful for Fargo. (and my daughter)

  10. My "Unbroken" was the time I couldn't find my phone for 15 minutes.

  11. I'm not afraid of death. I'm afraid of dying.

  12. What's the easiest way for Sam the butcher to get an erection? See Alice.

  13. Please follow Den Meditation on Instagram. It's my wife's business so I'm being supportive? Is that the word?

  14. Always nice to come down first thing in the morning to a loving, "What's wrong?!"

  15. Are you a slouchy weakling who can't do very much? Come be a writer in Hollywood!

  16. In the war between Ambien and masturbation the winner is zzzzzzzzz

  17. I'm in. You should be too.

  18. Nothing like Thanksgiving with family to remind you how great it is to watch TV alone.

  19. I'm dirty, but I'm not "drinking glass in a divorced dad's apartment" dirty.

  20. Crippling guilt and mind numbing fear aside, fatherhood is pretty terrible.

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