Alec SulkinOvjeren akaunt

@thesulk

Breaker of Swift Mustache Hairs

Los Angeles
Vrijeme pridruživanja: ožujak 2009.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet

    When I die, please don’t do an autopsy. Whatever happened is fine.

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  2. On Friday, we’re all required to attend something called “Non-Retaliation Training”. I’m soooo gonna get them for this.

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  3. “Alright Democrats, you’ve had 4 years to get ready. Time to step up to the plate.” “We forgot a bat.” “Thanks Democrats. That’ll be all.”

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  4. 3. velj

    Going to start a religion where Nobody is the savior. Remember, when you’re down, Nobody cares, and Nobody is there for you.

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  5. 2. velj

    Tough choice ahead.

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  6. 1. velj

    LeBron really honored Kobe last night by reminding us how much better Kobe was in crunch time.

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  7. 29. sij

    When I walk through an intersection, I give the stopped cars a little thank you wave but really it’s more ‘these aren’t the droids you’re looking for’.

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  8. 28. sij

    Does anything rely on human laziness more than the 30 day risk free trial?

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  9. 28. sij

    These Kobe tributes are really bringing out the egomaniacs who need to let everyone know they cried. Why can’t you just cry in private like I did it was so sad guys.

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  10. 27. sij

    Text: “Alec, add 3 inches to your manhood and drive the ladies crazy!” Oh come on. This is ridiculous. “If you do not wish to receive these alerts, text STOP.” Well, I don’t know if that’s necessary. They’re just doing their job.

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  11. 25. sij

    The Manning PR machine is incredible. They’ve already changed the debate from “is Eli a Hall of Famer?” to “is Eli a first ballot Hall of Famer?” Shouldn’t a Hall of Famer give you a better than average chance to win? He’s 117-117! The Human Coin Toss!

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  12. 24. sij

    Sports are the best because you never know what’s going to happen. (garbage can slams twice) You rarely know what’s going to happen.

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  13. 23. sij

    Married guys don’t wanna hear about other couples fights. It’s like being in Vietnam and somebody says “Hey there’s a civil war in Peru!” Who cares?! I just wanna see tomorrow!

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  14. 21. sij

    Radiohead makes me think heaven might be 43 and rainy.

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  15. 21. sij

    Just got glasses. I like them. My nose desperately needed an intermission.

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  16. 19. sij

    British guys seem so genteel and sophisticated then you mention the wrong soccer team and you’re in a headlock.

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  17. 17. sij

    Me: Millennials are upset by everything. Also me: Who turned the heat up to 71?!

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  18. 13. sij

    That’ll do, GMC tailgate ad. That’ll do.

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  19. 12. sij

    70 degrees in Boston today. How far will the Chinese go with this hoax?!

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  20. 12. sij
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  21. 11. sij

    Kids, if you get into The Beatles, you’ve just figured out about 15% of your life.

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