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@thefunnytweeter

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funnytweeter.com
Vrijeme pridruživanja: lipanj 2012.
35 fotografija ili videozapisa Fotografije i videozapisi

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    2. velj

    I've been RTing funny tweets every day c. 2012. Almost 85k tweets, close to 10k followers. I have severe social anxiety and therefore don't talk much to people, even online. I'm trying to get out of my comfort zone, is there anything you've wanted to ask me? Ask me anything

    69 replies 26 proslijeđenih tweetova 326 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    Me: How did my surgery go Surgeon: I'm afraid this will be difficult for you to hear Me: Surgeon: I accidentally cut your ears off

    146 proslijeđenih tweetova 988 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  3. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    7. lip 2018.

    Me: And what about this one? Waiter: Sir, this is a seafood restaurant. We have many items that taste “fishy”.

    167 proslijeđenih tweetova 275 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  4. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    7. lip 2018.

    him: *on one knee* me: you disrespectful piece of–

    169 proslijeđenih tweetova 619 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    29. sij 2018.

    Fortunately, I’m just tall enough to see out of these 2 holes in my face

    7 replies 212 proslijeđenih tweetova 364 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    28. kol 2018.

    9: Where's mom? Me: Out the back 9: Australia? M: Out THE back, not the Outback! 9: What's she doing? M: Playing with her didgeridoo, I think

    5 replies 223 proslijeđena tweeta 392 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    18. tra 2017.

    [Commercial for Milk] Tired of dipping your hot dog in boring old water?!

    15 replies 240 proslijeđenih tweetova 783 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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  8. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    24. tra 2015.

    Heroic fire saves man from having horrible house

    286 proslijeđenih tweetova 635 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 24 sata

    Wife: We're going to have a baby! Friend: Wow congrats! Are you going to find out what it is? Me: I already googled and it's a very tiny human

    913 proslijeđenih tweetova 7.438 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    24. sij 2018.

    I wouldn't trust someone as far as I could throw them [throws someone] ok, we can trust that baby

    6 replies 292 proslijeđena tweeta 616 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    6. pro 2018.

    God [creating winter precipitation]: Make it white, sparkly, quiet and serene. Angel: It’ll be beautiful. They’ll love it. God: Hmm. Make it slick and dangerous too. I don’t want to spoil them.

    13 replies 462 proslijeđena tweeta 1.135 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  12. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    31. sij 2018.

    Get off my horse you stupid moon

    20 replies 648 proslijeđenih tweetova 3.028 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. pro 2017.

    Brain: You’re getting older. Heart: No!! Age is just a number!! Nose Hair: Shut up guys, I’m in charge now.

    28 replies 1.033 proslijeđena tweeta 1.783 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    3. velj

    *Starts new job* Co-worker: Hello Me: How much was yo first check? 🧐😂

    190 replies 37.267 proslijeđenih tweetova 189.037 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    If a sorority computer chair can manually tab 1000s of girls in round 3 and we can stay up all damn night pro con proing and still get our list submitted on time Iowa can GET IT TOGETHER

    65 replies 3.365 proslijeđenih tweetova 36.711 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  16. prije 8 sati

    I love them "They had us in the first half" stories, and this is one of them!

    sleeping over at her place tonight
    1 reply 7 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    27. ožu 2017.

    [new job] BOSS: how bout u introduce yourself ME: I'm Howie BOSS: Howie? ME: Dewitt BOSS: everyone this is Howie Dewitt ME: *starts dancing*

    35 replies 1.583 proslijeđena tweeta 3.611 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    My 7 year old was tapping away on my Mac tonight and told me he was writing a book. I think you’ll agree it’s one hell of an opening.

    2.727 replies 23.467 proslijeđenih tweetova 183.361 korisnik označava da mu se sviđa
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  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    My husband has recently discovered that he's a coffee snob. Husband: I think I'd like a grinder. 12yo: Download it from the app store Me: Husband: 12yo:

    360 replies 10.828 proslijeđenih tweetova 86.679 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  20. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    5. velj 2018.

    date: what’s your dream job? me: designing food stats for RPGs date: umm ok… *sips water* me: [under breath] -2 thirst

    12.263 proslijeđena tweeta 48.129 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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  21. prije 11 sati

    OMG I AM A ROCKSTAR! BEST DAY EVER!! 😘😘😘😘

    Odgovor korisniku/ci @thefunnytweeter
    Had to go back and give you a mohawk because you're a rockstar.
    1 reply 1 proslijeđeni tweet 5 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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@thefunnytweeter još nije objavio nijedan Tweet.

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