FunnyTweeter.com

@thefunnytweeter

If we retweet you, that means your tweet was published in . To submit a tweet, use

Vrijeme pridruživanja: lipanj 2012.

Tweetovi

Blokirali ste korisnika/cu @thefunnytweeter

Jeste li sigurni da želite vidjeti te tweetove? Time nećete deblokirati korisnika/cu @thefunnytweeter

  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    2. velj

    I've been RTing funny tweets every day c. 2012. Almost 85k tweets, close to 10k followers. I have severe social anxiety and therefore don't talk much to people, even online. I'm trying to get out of my comfort zone, is there anything you've wanted to ask me? Ask me anything

    Poništi
  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    Me: How did my surgery go Surgeon: I'm afraid this will be difficult for you to hear Me: Surgeon: I accidentally cut your ears off

    Poništi
  3. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    7. lip 2018.

    Me: And what about this one? Waiter: Sir, this is a seafood restaurant. We have many items that taste “fishy”.

    Poništi
  4. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    7. lip 2018.

    him: *on one knee* me: you disrespectful piece of–

    Prikaži ovu nit
    Poništi
  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    29. sij 2018.

    Fortunately, I’m just tall enough to see out of these 2 holes in my face

    Poništi
  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    28. kol 2018.

    9: Where's mom? Me: Out the back 9: Australia? M: Out THE back, not the Outback! 9: What's she doing? M: Playing with her didgeridoo, I think

    Poništi
  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    [Commercial for Milk] Tired of dipping your hot dog in boring old water?!

    Poništi
  8. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Heroic fire saves man from having horrible house

    Poništi
  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 24 sata

    Wife: We're going to have a baby! Friend: Wow congrats! Are you going to find out what it is? Me: I already googled and it's a very tiny human

    Prikaži ovu nit
    Poništi
  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    24. sij 2018.

    I wouldn't trust someone as far as I could throw them [throws someone] ok, we can trust that baby

    Poništi
  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    6. pro 2018.

    God [creating winter precipitation]: Make it white, sparkly, quiet and serene. Angel: It’ll be beautiful. They’ll love it. God: Hmm. Make it slick and dangerous too. I don’t want to spoil them.

    Poništi
  12. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Get off my horse you stupid moon

    Prikaži ovu nit
    Poništi
  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. pro 2017.

    Brain: You’re getting older. Heart: No!! Age is just a number!! Nose Hair: Shut up guys, I’m in charge now.

    Poništi
  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    3. velj

    *Starts new job* Co-worker: Hello Me: How much was yo first check? 🧐😂

    Prikaži ovu nit
    Poništi
  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    If a sorority computer chair can manually tab 1000s of girls in round 3 and we can stay up all damn night pro con proing and still get our list submitted on time Iowa can GET IT TOGETHER

    Poništi
  16. I love them "They had us in the first half" stories, and this is one of them!

    Poništi
  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    27. ožu 2017.

    [new job] BOSS: how bout u introduce yourself ME: I'm Howie BOSS: Howie? ME: Dewitt BOSS: everyone this is Howie Dewitt ME: *starts dancing*

    Poništi
  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    My 7 year old was tapping away on my Mac tonight and told me he was writing a book. I think you’ll agree it’s one hell of an opening.

    Poništi
  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    My husband has recently discovered that he's a coffee snob. Husband: I think I'd like a grinder. 12yo: Download it from the app store Me: Husband: 12yo:

    Poništi
  20. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    5. velj 2018.

    date: what’s your dream job? me: designing food stats for RPGs date: umm ok… *sips water* me: [under breath] -2 thirst

    Prikaži ovu nit
    Poništi
  21. Poništi

Čini se da učitavanje traje već neko vrijeme.

Twitter je možda preopterećen ili ima kratkotrajnih poteškoća u radu. Pokušajte ponovno ili potražite dodatne informacije u odjeljku Status Twittera.

    Možda bi vam se svidjelo i ovo:

    ·