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  1. Pinned Tweet
    19 Mar 2016

    Some dad jokes from a date last night 1/2 - You like churros huh???... What do you call a churro in the shadows? ... CHIARASCHURRO

  2. Jun 9

    Dentist reveals mistakes almost everyone makes brushing their teeth via

  3. May 31

    When samplers just go door to door in . 😍 thanks for the morning boost!

  4. Retweeted
    May 14

    FDNYalerts MAN ALL HANDS 64 ESSEX ST,

  5. May 14
    Replying to
  6. May 14

    Major smoke coming from the east village

  7. Jan 13

    My 5 stages of beard growth are different people... which is fair TBH, meet Shane, Dane, Coltrane, Paine, and Shame. Also 👋🏼

  8. Retweeted
    Jan 3

    "Unexpected item in the bagging area" Me: What could- Criss Angel climbing out of a carton of eggs: Mindfreak!

  9. Retweeted
    30 Dec 2016

    I bought a for Christmas and I can say I'm pretty jealous of it right now as it just hangs there on the mirror.

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  10. Retweeted
    24 Dec 2016

    We saved the best gift of all for last! Retweet this for a chance to win a YEAR OF LACROIX! 🎉

  11. Retweeted
    21 Dec 2016
  12. Retweeted
    21 Dec 2016

    Tonight in my prayers I'm planning to thank good ole HF for the relative lack of Elves On The Shelf I've seen this year

  13. Retweeted
    13 Dec 2016

    Wanna see a creepy photo of my kid? Wanna see that photo made worse by my husband?

  14. Retweeted
    6 Dec 2016

    Maroon 5:13-14 "I don't mind spending every day out on your corner in the pouring rain. Look for the girl with the broken smile."

  15. Retweeted
    8 Nov 2016

    United States of Anxiety

  16. 1 Nov 2016
  17. Retweeted
    31 Oct 2016

    I tried the hipster toothbrush that’s all over Facebook and TBH I loved it

  18. 31 Oct 2016
  19. Retweeted
    28 Oct 2016

    I'm amazed at the longevity of the "I get/have money" mantra in modern music. Every Friday more luscious braggadocia ::)

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