when you engage with them, you participate in the lie that they are thinking. then, your pain can be transmuted into their celebrity. this further obscures it as pain, and obscures the violence of what caused the pain. of course, this isn't your fault, but--DON'T FALL FOR IT.
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Yes, thank you.
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No doubt in my mind you're absolutely right. Only thing I'd add: with people in your social circle, it's important not to let hateful comments stand unopposed. Representing trans rights clearly and calmly doesn't work on haters, it works on their (mostly silent) audience.
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