Stonekettle

Naturally, some readers were offended. Offended by the idea that every holiday ISN'T, and SHOULDN'T BE, about veterans. And that, that right there, that is what's wrong with America today, another glaring indicator of the dangerous road we're headed down. 2/

I'm a veteran. I suppose many of you knew that already. I earned my right to comment on veterans, and in particular this increasingly disturbing fetish America has with the military. 3/

I spent 24 years in uniform. In peace. In war. Both as an enlisted man and as an officer. I was decorated more than some, maybe less than others. 4/

I served with equal fidelity under conservative and liberal administrations. I wasn't anybody's hero, but I retired with honor. I'm proud of my service. Glad that I served. Glad to have worn the uniform and glad to have done the things I did. I think I was good at it. 5/

I held true to the core values, I never did anything that I need be ashamed of -- even if the wars themselves were less than honorable. I can be proud of the men and women I served with and the things we accomplished together. And I am. 6/

But, see, here's the thing: that part of my life is over. It's over. 7/

I've been many things in my life, just as my father was many things before me. He was a veteran too, but that was only a small part of the man he was, the man I so respected, and perhaps the least important part. Maybe that's where I get it from. 8/

Me? While my long military service and the things I did and saw during my career certainly shaped who I am now, being a veteran is only a part of who I am. And perhaps, like my dad, the least important part. Who I am NOW is what matters, not who I was. 9/

Being a good father, a good husband, a good writer, a good citizen, those things are important to me NOW. Being a veteran is only part of that, a part that while important to me, grows further and further distant with every passing day. 10/

I find it sad and terrible, when being a veteran is the ONLY thing you have. The only thing that matters. The most important part of your identity. That's a tragedy. 11/

I meet these people, down at the VA, here online, out there on the street. The veterans who just can't move on. 12/

I know a guy who served a few years in the Navy, back in the 60's. He served honorably, but he never saw combat, not like the grunts in the rice paddies. He did a tour, did his duty, patrolled the Gulf of Tonkin, went when called and served his country, and then got out. 13/

And there's not one goddamned thing wrong with that. He's a vet. It's certainly something to be proud of, something to be respected. But ... well, it was 50 years ago. And it's ALL he ever talks about. It's his whole life. Those four years. 14/

People see him coming and they cross the street, because they've heard the same stories a thousand times. Seven decades of life and that's what defines him. He's a veteran. That's it. He's an old man now, lives alone waiting to die, and that's all he's got. 15/

And that's fucking sad. That's tragic. That's terrible. To have your entire life defined by that one thing. 16/

Being a veteran is only a part of my life, and that part grows smaller every day -- because if you LIVE, really live, then you redefine yourself as you go along. Being a veteran, sure, you bet I'm proud of that, but I'm proud of the OTHER things I am too. 17/

And THAT, well, that was the real point of yesterday's post. 18/

The military is only a small part of America. And while you can be proud of those soldiers, they are only a small part of what makes AMERICA, a small part of her history. And you can celebrate THOSE OTHER THINGS TOO, and that is no disrespect to veterans. 19/