Steeve again

@steeve_again

idiot with an outlet Byte: steeve_again recent tweets:

Vrijeme pridruživanja: travanj 2019.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    14. sij

    Fun fact: Michelangelo painted the Sistine Chapel while on his back cause once they’re on their shell a turtle can’t flip over

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  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    At Red Raw tomorrow night host presents headliner and a whole bunch of newbies! We got snacks too! Tix & info

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    doctor: we're putting you in a cast me: [a struggling actor] will I have any lines?

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    *mixes ketchup with hot sauce to make SpicyKetchup™️* I’m thinking of applying to culinary school

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    2. velj

    I've been RTing funny tweets every day c. 2012. Almost 85k tweets, close to 10k followers. I have severe social anxiety and therefore don't talk much to people, even online. I'm trying to get out of my comfort zone, is there anything you've wanted to ask me? Ask me anything

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    Shakira I would pay your tax bill if i could please dm

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    america: ayyy australia: g’dayy america: lmao new zealand: lmaori

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    Friend: How was your Australia trip? Me: *disappointed I wasnt able to carry an adult kangaroo in a baby bjorn while they had a baby kangaroo in their pouch* It was fine I guess

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    prije 7 sati

    Me: I’m spiraling Therapist: let’s reverse that Me: how? Therapist: *googling plane tickets* Australia

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    prije 7 sati

    Crocodile Dundee: you call that a knife? me: yes Dundee: what do you call this? me: a fork

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    Vegemite implies that vegemay.

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    Friend: Do you wanna come with me to Australia? Me: Ah sorry, I cant take off work Friend: I’m just nervous because they say everything there is trying to kill you Me: *suddenly holding a packed suitcase* We should get to the airport early

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 20 sati

    me: keep your friends close and your enemies closer gf: yeah you said that but there’s like 20 people in bed with us now

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    prije 20 sati

    me, the only one in spanish class who can’t roll his r’s:

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 21 sat

    Yoda Groot 🤝 🤝 Baby 🤝 🤝 Spice Nut

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    [Monday Morning] Co-Worker: What a super bowl! Me: *very proud of my homemade pottery* Wow thank you so much dude

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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 23 sata

    Crocodile Dundee: you call that a knife? me: yes what do you call it? Dundee: this is a sharpy stabaroo

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  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    USA: super bowl UK: soup bowl

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    australian: didgeridoo me: no i was happy first time

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  20. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Pulls your dick out of my mouth to ask if you think I'm cute.

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  21. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    PROSECUTOR: if it pleases the court we would like to see your honor’s alleged micro penis JUDGE: what ME [a ventriloquist defense attorney]: whoa you gonna just let him get away with that

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