“Incels” are not a downtrodden, marginalized group. They’re a bog standard part of rape culture. No one is entitled to the body of another human being.
I beg do disagree. I could have been "an incel". Only got to fuck at 26a old. Pretty much hated the world at that point; got to fuck only because a gay friend of mine acquainted me with an older dominatrix. Who really did beat me silly, till she didn't.
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Now you see, once you see the world via a certain manly mindset, not having been had at 26a is pretty bad. It's much worse than physical pain; I took mine already, so I know. I've gone through self-harm you couldn't imagine.
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Nobody should go there/where I too went. Yet people do. And it's always young boys, absent girlfriends/spouses. They even know this in terrorism research. It's always primal bitterness for not having procreative prospects, basically. Stupid as simple as fuck. :(
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Being lonely is painful, but it’s not something that excuses being abusive - incels as a movement are advocating for terrible things as a solution.
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Toxic masculinity isn’t just toxic to women - it’s toxic to men who can’t talk about their feelings without being scorned. A lot of grievances that men have about this are shared by feminists who attack rape culture.
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Yes. But as a man, from the masculine standpoint, I'm not too certain the feminist understanding really covers my/our experience, fully. I do understand toxic masculinity, but how about things like gf punching me in the face, repeatedly for fun? I believe toxicity goes around.
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Violence is violence, however: We can’t ignore the numbers. Most abuse of women *and* men is by men, by a wide margin. This has implications for men as victims:
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Toxic masculinity includes the expectation that men should dominate. Men should abuse. When men are abused, they aren’t fulfilling their role in a toxic system.
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Interestingly, I've dominated my younger girlfriend. She's liked it, too. I'd argue sometimes it's about abuse. But sometimes it's also about utilization and coöptation of extant roles, for the other uses. Like mine and my girl's sexual power play.
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