MetaJess

All else being equal, if you “wanted” to do something but then didn’t do it, it means you didn’t actually want to do it. Maybe you thought you should, you recognised the value etc. But that is very different to actually wanting something. You have no problem doing what you want.

very true in most cases, but there's also paralyzing anxiety I wanted very much to do something, but was too afraid and when I entered a relatively anxiety-free period of my life I did it and greatly enjoyed it

There are many reasons why someone wouldn't do something they want. Like for me, severe fatigue. The view that people can do anything they want is really simplistic and reductive. And can be harmful.

Yeah the all else being equal part is trying to do this work here

It's just very, very common to have e.g. executive dysfunction, fatigue, monetary limitations and other limitations. Being able to do what you want is a huge privilege.

As mentioned to another commenter on this thread “all else being equal” means “as long as you don’t have chronic health or monetary problems” - real world constraints are real.

I'd think you'd avoid using a rhetorical cliche that associates chronic health or monetary problems with a lack of equality, given the history of various civil rights movements. "It's ok, she means equality of conditions, give her a pass on the language"