So, I've been having this relaxing feeling about the Inevitablility of the Speed of Time 
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But ultimately there is this package of experience that cannot be compressed. You are subject to your sensory impressions of your immediate surroundings *all the time* and in fact, that's the *only* way that you're aware of anything, all the time.
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Annihilating consciousness is possible, but you're always pushing against the tide. Depressed people sleep a lot. Other people use depressant drugs (alcohol, cannabis, heroin) but if you stop doing these, even for an hour, your consciousness is just right back as if it never left
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Ok so that's 1). That's a thing about the universe. When I was younger I was so anxious about time rolling on bc I wanted to shape the future by making the right decisions. When I was depressed I woke up in the morning and was like "this again". Days weight hanging on my neck
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But now, I feel something else (this is 2)) I can rely on time to keep going, and this is comforting. I can passively give up on trying to control things, but the passivity is positive. I can relax and watch my life as if it's an exciting theatre show.
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I can wonder what tomorrow will bring, not knowing *exactly what* will happen, but also knowing that, whatever it is, I will *definitely find out* what's going to happen because time will roll it onto me. Things will happen whether I want, choose, or not. And that's very restful!
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I don't have to do anything at all to: - change myself - change the world - change day to day happenings - find new things - reflect on old things - meet new people It all just happens anyway, with no effort from me.
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So I can robotically do a few random tasks if I like or do nothing at all and yet still have full VIP access to all of life, for free, forever (until the last day), no extra input or stress needed. It all feels so comfortable, just enjoying watching the show.
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