MetaJess

Yes, what amazes me is that I would have had no way of articulating these differences! You're "staring" in both cases! Some men do look at you like this, and it does feel very uncomfortable but it's v hard to say why exactly they come off as "creepy"

Yep. If you look you'll see my facial expression change, but I'm not *doing* any of that directly, it's a consequence of the awareness. The creepy vibe could also be seen as my awareness intruding in yours in a non consensual way. I teach defence against the dark arts too

if you wanted to quickly teach a person to stop being creepy and you didn't have time to go through the whole AT thing, you could also specify the change explictly: gently bop your head in various direction, tilt head a little back, punctuate some words by raising eyebrows, etc

Without the awareness stuff none of that would make a difference, you'd must be creepy with your head and eyebrows in a different position.

well, not really, I can't perceive the size of your awareness, I'm perceiving the pixels that land on my retina; what makes me stop feeling creeped out is a change in visual cues

Yes, but on your side you can't coordinate your face in the way I'm doing here directly. Any conscious coordination is part of the same potentially creepy/compressed vibe. It can only be accessed indirectly, which is what all this is about.

I mean that's definitely the ultimate and optimal solution, I'm just saying you can pick some low hanging fruit and make some improvement by consciously training the habit of being more expressive with your face

I guess I mostly wanted to react to >it's v hard to say why exactly they come off as "creepy" and point out the specific cues that make a person creepy so it's easier to understand for people how the change happens