het dudes: situation where you exclusively have sex with one girl *among other dudes*, but you’re fed, play vidya, travel/camp and you just have to cooperate with the other men (and the 1 woman) to raise kids/chore/light economic work (10-20hr/wk job), essentially communal family
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I have no trouble finding a variety of contexts for men to show off their ambition and dominance to me
@ChasingMyself I'm surprised! But then I'm used to thinking of gender norms as at best "suggestions". You seem way more trapped into the really basic versions of what "being a man" is and what "masculinity" is (?) Is it not obvious that the popular ones are optional?
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Sometimes I feel really unconstrained and like I can be flexible with rules. Everything flows and feels high-energy and people around me respond. But then when I start feeling constrained by who I am/how I act, I re-interpret that response as due to fitting social default roles.
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ah that makes sense to me, like it’s easy to be open and flexible when you’re open and flexible but when you’re not it’s suddenly vulnerable to stray from the norm?
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