A very large part of my mental activity is devoted, in one way or another, to figuring out how everything works.
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This tendency was born from trauma. I wanted to know how things worked so that I could try to stop them from hurting and scaring me.
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Now it's just a habit that has served me quite well, but I'm more frequently side-eyeing, wondering whether to double down and try to use it in career/life, or whether to actively stop, in case its blocking something else, or even hurting me
