Being nice and trying to understand or change in this situation is futile, only thing you can do is exit as fast as possible. Hard to identify in real time of course, but one helpful thought: is my partner in this relationship on my team? If you’re not on the same team, it’s bad.
Yes that is hard. I do like, though that family is this weird relationship, if we accept it’s mandatory (don’t have to - run from abusers!) or for life, it opens interesting questions and possibilities that choiceful relationships don’t. It’s like a tattoo - an ongoing mirror.
